Easter?

I just can't get my head wrapped around that Easter is this weekend. I feel guilty for not being 'ready', almost feel disconnected. I don't feel disconnected from God but from the calendar. Could someone give me a couple more weeks, please? I don't want to have the wrong mindset going into the greatest celebration we have as Christians. This weekend is about Jesus' resurrection, not about dinner, candy, eggs, bunnies or decorations - good thing coz I don't have any of that figured out. Not interested in the traditional Easter dinner. Have not decided what I'm going to fix yet. Might be enchiladas - just kidding - maybe liver and onions - ok, kidding again. I just don't know and it is stresses me a little. Oh, my. I just thought to myself, you need to read the scriptures about His final days to prepare your heart for this season and I realized I don't want to hear about how we disappointed Him and so many missed Him and to be reminded His suffering....I think I'm in an avoidance mode. Hmmmmm.....anyone else feeling discumberated??? Hope I'm alone in this coz it just doesn't feel good.